I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
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