so that wasnt chicken after all
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize