Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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