Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
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Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
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I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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