so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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