This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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