I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
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Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
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Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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