At least make sure they are 18
Why
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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