by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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