i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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