I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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