I heard we made out
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize