He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
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