Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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