We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize