im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
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gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
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You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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