i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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