U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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