So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
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Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
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I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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