i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize