i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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