I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Randomize