The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize