i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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