i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize