Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
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She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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