I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I love you. Go after that dick
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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