they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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