How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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