Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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