Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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