What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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