this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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