Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reggie can tackle my bush.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize