I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
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Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
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i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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