Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
should my penis look like a turkey
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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