we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize