he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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