ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize