I'm gonna have a badass scar
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
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we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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