I'm jealous of your bromance
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
She bit a glass in half.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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