I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize