Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize