It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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