Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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