maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize