I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize