Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize