Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
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Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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