I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize